Bangkok Babylon = Bangkok Blog Boredom

One of my favorite things to do when I travel is read books set in the country I’m visiting.  It adds a whole layer of richness to the experience with deeper appreciation for the what’s going on around me; the quirks, idiosyncrasies and history that influenced why I'm seeing what I'm seeing. If I pick carefully, it can be more insightful than any guidebook.  (Top tip: if you're on your way to Australia, be sure to bring Bill Bryson's In a Sun-Burnt County.)

I recently downloaded Bangkok Babylon after hearing Anthony Bourdain mention it on No Reservations. It's a collection of stories by Jerry Hopkins about some of Thailand's most colorful and less-savory expats. Hopkins has lived here for close to twenty years and has a knack for meeting them all. His advice? To do exactly what your mother told you not to do - talk to strangers.  I’m on the fence about how much I like the book. The people are interesting and it gives great insight, but the writing style doesn't keep me glued. It's missing something. I can't say what, although I do keep reading. 

Anyway, the most recent story starts out with a great line; “It was my belief that Bernard Trink was not only boring, but dangerous.” How’s that for attention grabbing?  It turns out the guy’s a popular expat columnist for the Bangkok Post. (Former journalist/English speaking paper.) According to Hopkins he wrote weekly about about go-go girls and his troubles in finding size 40 waist-band pants.  Hopkins complains about the ‘banality’ of the articles and as he’s giving more and more examples, like Trink's need to report on the increasing cost of beef stew and his fav bar changing the times of happy hour, I suddenly realize I’ve just done the exact same thing. I've just devoted half a blog post to my quest for sheets and then posted a picture of my bed.  Ouch. Sorry guys.

As for why Bernard is so dangerous, I’m not sure yet.  I think it’s because he’s held in such high-regard by his readership that he can single-handedly make or break any establishment he reviews, but who knows, I need to finish the story and that’s not really my point anyhow.  My point is that while he can at least have the privilege of being boring and dangerous, I’m at risk of just being plain boring… and I don’t want to alienate that growing Russian readership.  

So, from now on, no more stories about the fascinating availability of bedding and peanut butter. Gripping, I know, but lesson learned. I promise.

As for Bangkok Babylon and Bernard Trink?  Let's just wait and see.

Cabbages & Condoms

3D condom art

Last week I went to dinner at a place called Cabbages & Condoms.  While some restaurants might give you mints with the check, they gave us condoms.

I could just leave you with that odd fact, but as an NGO worker I feel obligated to give you the full story because it is kinda cool… The place is actually a long-standing fundraising arm of one of the biggest domestic non-profits in Thailand. They focus on family planning and AIDS prevention among rural low-income populations.  Cabbages refers to the staple diet and condoms, well, I guess that’s self-explanatory.

The founder, a guy named Mechai Viravaidya and nick-named “Mr Condom" has been handing out condoms (or mechais) with his business cards since the 70s. It didn’t matter who was in attendance.  

The meal was delicious and as the website proudly states:  “Our food is guaranteed not to cause pregnancy.” 

Enjoy.

Here’s their blurb and the website http://www.cabbagesandcondoms.com…

The Population and Community Development Association (PDA) was founded in 1974 as a non-governmental organization with the initial aim to complement the efforts of the Royal Thai Government in promoting family planning in Thailand, especially in areas where knowledge and access to services were scarce. Utilizing a participatory, community-based approach, PDA recruited and trained residents of villages and urban neighborhoods to provide information on family planning, including the supervised, non-medical distribution of oral contraceptives. This distribution network covered more than one-third of the country, thus contributing significantly to the decrease in the annual population growth rate from 3.3% in the mid-1970s to 0.6% in 2005. During the same period, the number of children per family fell from 7 to under two.

Shopping & Sheets

Bangkok culture seems to be centered on shopping malls - big, modern, glass and marble buildings with seven floors, natural light, designer brands I can't afford and gigantic international grocery stores that take up the lowest level.  I’m not sure if I’ve seen such luxurious shopping centers before, even in the US.  

Every sky train stop has one attached to it and there will be two or three in a couple blocks of each other catering to foreign tourists (mainly Chinese) and wealthy, Hi-So (high-society) Thais.  People meet and spend their entire day there eating donuts (Krispy Kreme, Dunkin, the Thais appear to be addicted, but in the culture swap of crullers for curries, I definitely think we won.).  Even when I met some family friends for dinner we ended up eating in a mall, at a Spaghetti Factory.... so bizarre. 

Ironically, I never go to the mall at home.  In fact, last Christmas I got lost going to the mall (Trumbull) and ended up 10 miles past it in Stratford before knowing it.  Now I use my GPS at home and visit the Bangkok malls daily.  

Then there’s Tesco and Big C – the Thai equivalent of Wal-Mart and Target (except Tesco is British and Big C was French and bought by Thais…. bonus being they kept the French ovens and make some amazing bread!)  The stores are huge, maybe double the size of a typical American box store - so big that the stock boys wear roller-blades to get around the store quicker.  

They also sell EVERYTHING from EVERYWHERE – Aussie’s looking for Tim-Tams, Brits looking for digestives, Yanks looking for Peter Pan peanut butter (guess I didn’t need to pack some!)  They have it…. Even my favourite Danish butter than I can never find in CT, plus other American goods I never saw in London.

My $100 investment - pretty, right?   : - s

The one thing they don’t sell is sheets – flat sheets. Fitted sheets, no problem, but flat sheets just don't exist. , I spent the first two and a half weeks running through every mall looking for flat sheets.  I did find some at a super fancy, up-market department store where all the Hi-So people like to shop just for the bragging rights. The price?  $500.  (FOR A SHEET!!!!)

Why didn’t I pack my trusty old pair that my mom purchased before I was born, before fitted sheets and Egyptian cotton were invented?  The pair that travelled my world dressing beds in Santa Fe, Buffalo, AmeriCorps and London, that lined sleeping bags and hostel dorms from China to Chile, that smelled periodically of campfire and bug spray and New England pine.  Where are you pseudo tie-dyed sheets, so faded and loved?  

Sigh... I did you wrong. I threw you out of my Thailand bound duffle thinking I’d treat myself to something new.  I miss you now…. and the hundred bucks I spent replacing you.  

Sniff. 

Oh and before my mom sends an email asking why....  The reason you can't find flat sheets in this constant 90 degree plus humidity tropical climate is because the Thais prefer a duvet - to keep them warm. Go figure.

A blog is a blog is a blog is not an essay

I realize I kinda suck at this blogging thing… I’m better at writing essays and that’s what I seem to have - a word doc entitled ‘blog’ that is really a collection of half-finished essays about random events, kinda funny, kinda quirky, kinda waiting to be told.  A friend said no more than 500 words. Another just complained the entries are too damn long. I kinda miss my writing group.

Meanwhile, the actual blog feels thin and doesn't really capture much.  Sorry. 

I’m going to see if I can do short and punchy. I’m going to see if I can do a weekly weekend update.  I’m going to see if I can edit my ‘essays’ and get them posted.  I’m going to see if anybody cares.  I'm going to see if anybody reads this thing anyway.   ;)  

There is this one cool feature that lets me see where my readers are by country.  Apparently the Russians love me, along with one guy in the United Arab Emirates. I lost the following in Nepal. Hi-ya Folks.

Anyway, here goes….

Crazy Coincidence Sunday

So I'm sitting here streaming House Hunters International Bangkok on my laptop when my roommate comes home and asks what I'm watching. I explain the show and she starts laughing hysterically....   Next thing I know the episode cuts to the housewarming and there's Nok - a guest at the party!!!!!!!!!!

Check it out for yourself...   HHI - Bangkok with Nok!!  

(Ironically, Nok never saw the episode until now. She also told me Linda and Mitch didn't last in BKK very long.)

Want a couple other odd coincidences related to our home....?

• The name of our street is Soi Ari.  Soi means street, Ari is my best friend - she owns two huskies.

• There are three dogs that live on the grounds. Two are huskies.

• There's other stuff too, but it gets kinda trippy.... message me and I'll share

Anyway, I think I'm exactly where I'm meant to be!  :)

  

It's Not Just Me....

I woke up this morning with an impulse to call a good friend back in CT to see what she was up to for the day.  On some level I must have forgotten I was in Thailand  - either that or old habits really do die hard.

Instead of making the call, I sent her an email and explained it like this: 

I love it here, but still prefer old friends like a comfy pair of well-worn walking shoes. Meeting new people can sometimes feel like stumbling around town in a new pair of heels, trying to present yourself well on an unfamiliar route - you just hope they don't end up rubbing you the wrong way.  I'm sure I'll eventually grow to love them too, but it takes time to break them in. 

Yes, I’ve been lucky to meet lots of great, new people here, but there’s always something about old friends. I just wish they’d hurry up and commercialize the rest of that old Star Trek gear so I can zap some friends in for a day. 

Speaking of visits, it has been a really good week for that.  I now have my first confirmed visitor, plus a few other promising guests. I’m also excited at how many of my friends seem to be taking big leaps of faith and cashing in on long-time dreams and new beginnings.  One friend finally took the plunge to uproot and live out an oft-wished for life in Denver. No job, no plans, just a car full of possessions and a longing for the Rockies. Another just closed on some tough times and a long-desired beach cottage in Florida. She needed a change and I’m so happy she’s setting out on some sun-filled adventures down-south. I’ll miss you both in CT, but hell, this is exciting!!

My favorite though, is an old-friend who I met twelve years ago on a trip to Ecuador. Although we’ve never lived closer than a thousand miles apart, we’ve logged four continents, nine countries and dozens of local brews together. For years and years, (maybe even the entire duration of our friendship?) we’ve planned and catalogued her dream of quitting corporate America, selling her high-rise Chicago condo and leaping into the wonders of an extensive round-the-world trip and more spiritual life.  Suddenly, it’s happening. Bravo!

This is the type of ballsiness and risk-taking I love (even more so when each involves a visit to Bangkok!) Life is for living and having friends like these makes me proud and inspired. Do what makes you happy, people. Get out of the hum-drum and monotony. Have faith, have courage, have me as your biggest cheerleader.

So, congrats to all and, remember, if your company is looking to send you to Mexico for two years on a delicious expat contract, please, please, please get up and go!!!  I might just see you there….

Food Coma - Vegetarian Festival

Last night I came home from a vegetarian festival and was greeted at the gate by a trio of wagging tales… it’s nice to have a canine welcome back in my life, but even better to have Bangkok street food.

Since I’ve arrived, I’ve been pretty lucky to have had lots of introductions and invitations out to do stuff. The ex-pat community here is strong and they welcome in the newbies with a someone-took-good-care-of-me-when-I-first-arrived-so-let’s-pass-it-on mentality. Between people from work, fellow consultants, mutual friends and random people I’ve met along the way, my social life has been full….  ironically though it’s been full of French restaurants, contemporary cuisine and American style burger joints.  My fear? It seems like you can actually get sick of Thai food??!

China Town

So when my food-expert friend invited me to go to the vegetarian food festival in China Town I jumped at it.  I’m told the festival originated during a drought in China.  The farmers prayed for rain for their crops vowing to become vegetarian for one week each year if their prayers were answered. I guess the god/s took pity on them because now it’s an annual tradition.* With 30% of the population here being of Chinese descent their customs hold strong. Ironically though, the festival is also celebrated with a lot of self-mutilation; piercing cheeks with spears, peeling back skin and impaling various body parts.  Go figure.

  

Fried Flowers

Anyway, I arrived as instructed with an empty stomach and comfy walking shoes, and immediately felt like I stepped into my own episode of Globe Trekker or Anthony Bourdain. Food stalls run the length of the street for about a mile or so and people are jammed into every crevice.  Unlike street festivals at home, here they don’t actually shut down the street – so you’re at the mercy of the drivers not to hit you and the crowd to not shove you into the ceaseless abattoir of traffic. I kind of want a helmet.

Looking around, it’s a semi-organized chaos of propane tanks, generators, charcoal pits and wonky looking tents decorated by strings of yellow flags signifying vegetarian food. We wander past stall after stall of familiar (mushroom stir fry) and crazy (fried flowers – orchids, roses, banana blossoms) offerings.  We watch strong-men pound peanuts in alternating blows like men pounding spikes on the transcontinental railroad.  Their creation, a fudgy type treat in a filo type pastry. Yum!

Coconut milk dessert poured into egg cups

Lucky for me, my friend is familiar with most of the stuff and zeroes in on what to get.  He hops from stall to stall ordering treats I must try.  We eat things like coconut rice pudding bake in bamboo, dough balls in ginger syrup and eggy-milk dumplings topped with sweet spices whose names I will never recall.

After dessert we headed to dinner at a street side seafood restaurant further down the block.  In an effort to try all the best dishes we ordered five entrees for the two of us; mussels in a garlic cilantro sauce, oysters with peanut, chive and chili toppings, a peanut shrimp curry and a baked sweet and sour sea bass, plus the classic shrimp tom yum.  (My friend shared that in the local fisherman’s culture it’s considered unlucky to flip over the fish to access the underside. "If the fish tips over, so will the boat."  Instead, when the meat from the top side is gone, you remove the layer of bones and keep on digging.  As foreigners, we just flip it over and hope for the best.)

It was one of those meals where the food is so good it’s really hard to carry on a conversation… your attention is on your mouth and it would be a disservice to put it anywhere else. This is what I came for.  This is what I’ll remember. So, sooo good….. I am one lucky girl.

Street-side seafood restaurant

shrimp peanut curry and shrimp tom yum

sweet and sour seas bass, mussels 

*Just Googled the origins and got a totally different answer…  take your pick.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nine_Emperor_Gods_Festival

Home Away From Home part 2

I woke up to pigeons cooing and a rooster’s crackle.  Welcome to Bangkok – urban and rural.

I moved into my new place on Thursday with a Thai woman about my age.  She greeted me with the best chicken coconut curry soup I ever tasted and a promise to teach me how to make it.  (It’s easy, she says, the trick is balancing the fish sauce and the lime.) She also says her mom and sister are amazing cooks and visit once a month.  I think this could work out well.

So the other place didn't work out (went to someone who was available for a 1-year contract), but living with a local had always been my first choice.  Nok, my roommate grew up in Bangkok and knows the city well. She’s already introduced me a $12 Chinese acupuncturist and an English speaking monk who runs Saturday studies across the road. I had my first class in Buddhism and meditation this morning. There’s also a definite perk to having a Thai speaking roommate who can get on the phone with my confused, non-English speaking taxi driver to direct us both home late on a tipsy Friday night. Yes, I think this could work out very well.

The place itself is nice – bright, cheery, high-up and breezy with multiple balconies and en suite loos. It’s a 12 unit gated complex with a pool, Jacuzzi, garden, and security guard.  It even has an elevator! (Anyone who’s ever visited me in SoNo and been stuck lugging shit up all the stairs will get my excitement.) It might sound like the lap of luxury, but for $380 a month - utilities and weekly cleaning service included - it would be silly not to. Plus there are three dogs, a cat and a giant blue and gold macaw in residence. They belong to the caretaker and are all very helpful in keeping me from adopting a street cat to take home to my parents… again.

You can see pics of the place here… http://bangkok.craigslist.co.th/roo/4055666658.html

The funny thing is, when I came to see it last weekend I arrived via the BTS (Thai subway/tube/metro) and walked 15 mins down a leafy side street. I figured 15 mins to the main road wouldn't be too bad, even if the area felt a little sleepy. Ha!  What I didn't realize (until I moved in) was that just 5 mins in the other direction is the Thai version of SoNo with all kinds of fun bars, restaurants and shops - kind of an open-air pedestrian street market. http://www.kvillagebangkok.com  

No train to keep me up, but plenty of suffering with Bruno Mars karaoke until 1am instead… and then there’s the damn rooster and pigeons. Oh well.

Humph

First bout of homesickness last night. Met the German, but didn't realize they had a bunch of people interested in the room.  Basically, he was intereviewing a few of us and will decide today who gets the room.

I didn't know that - I thought I had it and meeting him was a formaility.  I'd even turned down an invitation to do something tonight because I figured I'd be  moving.  I remember going through this in London when I first got there.  I must have met with dozens of house shares and couldn't get in. It's a horrible feeling and in London it was coupled with my resume being rejected again and again, too.  In the end I took a crap room in a dumpy house, but the job was a positive. I ended up reporting in to a brewery every day and had guys proposing most nights when they learnt I worked for Guinness. At least that was pretty awesome.

Anyway, I got home feeling kind of crap, wishing I had my cat  next to me and my friends down the hall.  I didn't mind being in a hotel when I thought there was an end point - now I'm anxious to get out. I'd wanted to go do the tourist thing this weekend and get to the islands next weekend, but I may be back house-hunting.

On the flipside, I realized the local guy who hangs out in front of my hotel now recognizes me and makes an effort to catch my eye and smile every morning.  Plus the woman who makes my Thai toast* breakfast seems to consider me a regular.  The first time I went to her she kept putting me at the back of the queue while she prepared the bread for her locals.  Now I get a regular spot in rotation and today she even asked where I was from. Plus the IT guy at work got my laptop working again, so last night was the first time since spring I had access to all my photos and music. They're small comforts, but I'll take them.

*Thai Toast - I don't know the official name for it, but it's like the Thai answer to French toast, so that's what I call it.  It's think slices of bread toasted over a charcoal pit. It's buttered, sugared and doused in condensed milk before being cut into little squares and served with a wooden skewer.  That, plus deep fried bananas with sesame and a pork satay, all from local street vendors, have become my breakfast routine.  Total cost? 95cents.

It's Just Food!

I love that they serve beer with ice cubes and red wine chilled in a frosted glass.  Is this what happens in lands of eternal summer?  In Upstate NY they serve our drinks under an outdoor heater, even in July.

I also like that my hotel serves fries with both ketchup and mayo to win bi-continental favor.  (Sorry, Dad, no malt vinegar.)  However, the breakfast buffet is clearly Asian:

• pork with chilli
• chicken with gravy
• black jelly with ginger tea
• minced chicken soup (with self-serve topping of chives, peanures, chillies and a few others I haven't figured out yet.)
• kidney beans
• carrot cream soup 
• chicken cocktail sausage
• macaroni
• vegetable fried rice with oyster sauce

When I stumbled downstairs the first morning at 6AM severely disoriented and drunk on jet lag, I honestly thought I'd confused AM for PM.  One week later and I'm happily eating eat duck confit for breakfast.

P.S. Just got an email from Flo who says he's "looking forward to meeting me." Yep - time to go all girly, over-analyzing and reading into a completely meaningless, throw-away comment....  ;)   

Home Away From Home

I go on a lot of dates; first dates, second dates, blind dates, online dates, but this Thursday could be one of the most important.  I’ve never met him before, but I’m hoping by the end he’ll ask me to move in.

I’ve been house-hunting since I got here – deciding between living alone, living with expats or living with locals. (Can’t find any locals advertising rooms for rent [in English, ha!] so that’s now ex-ed out!)  After being in my own place for eight and half years with no one but a pint sized kitty to answer to, it’s kind of a big deal. I never saw myself having roommates again, but I never saw myself leaving Connecticut either.

Since last week, I’ve seen all kinds of places; units in tall, shiny buildings with doormen, shuttle service, and rooftop infinity pools; house shares in traditional old homes with a high-turnover and backpacker vibe; soulless studios in residential hotels and promising one-bedrooms all modern and clean.  It’s unreal what you can get for your money here.  Luxury living in the trendiest neighborhoods with the fanciest amenities costs just under $1,000 a month. The budget conscious can live well for about $250.  It’s almost like being back in Buffalo, but with heat and a permanent NHL lockout.

The place I found is different. It has character and spaciousness and a 30-something German whose approval I need to win. It’s a gorgeous house share that I desperately want. I visited on Saturday and clicked well with Marta, the other housemate who’s from Poland.  She's now set up a ‘date’ for Flo and me on Thurs when he’s back from a trip. If he likes me, I’m in.

Usually, no problem. I’m pretty comfortable heading out and meeting guys. I put on a some mascara and charm, then fend my way through a few nerves and awkward opening moments. We grab a drink, chat for a while and figure out if there’s any chemistry. The stakes are low – bonus if we decide on a second date.

But this is different. I want him to like me.  I need him to like me.  I want that house, that room, that gorgeous, breezy, elevated view of the Bangkok skyline at night, that 4000 sq. ft. of space, the wrap-around balcony and en suite bathroom, the socially minded European housemates to make experimental Thai curries with and go on trips to Chiang Mai.  I want the guest quarters for all my visiting friends.  At the end of the night, I’m not looking for a peck on the cheek and or a questionable promise to call me again, I’m looking for an invitation from a guy to go live with him.  

Will he like me?  Will I be cool enough? I feel like I’m 14 and waiting for the popular boy to ask me to homecoming. I could have a lot riding on this – new friends, new experiences, the shape of my time in Bangkok.

Tomorrow night I’ll know.