I am at termite today. Yes, intentionally, plucked straight off the tree. He was supposed to taste like carrots, but he was just crunchy. I´m told the type of wood they eat determines what they taste like, I guess mine just wasn´t eating carrot flavoured wood.
The good news is I´m learning a lot of survival skills. That´s great for me because ever since I was a kid I´ve been fascinated by survivor stories and have mentally filed away random tips to help me when I need them. So if I´m ever being chased by a hippopotamous I know to zig zag then climb a tree, if caught in an avalance or mudslide and can´t figure out which was is up, just spit and if your car goes underwater shortcircuiting your windows, punch out the windshield to escape... I even carry the recommended screwdriver in ym glove box. It´s part paranoia and part love of useless info that makes me the perfect trivial pursuit partner.
So far I´ve learned a lot of jungle survival skills. Guido, my guide at the conservation center started me off. I didn´t help that the last episode of "I Shouldn´t Be Alive" I saw before arriving here featured a young couple lost on the Costa Rican jungle. Guido thought it was funny when I mentioned this and started pointing out all the tips to keep me alive. So when the couple saw a ´clearing´in the jungle and decided to stop there for the night - uh-uh, not me. It´s a leaf cutter ant nest.... those things clear a whole 15ft x 15ft section of forest, stripped clean of everything green. Not a good bed. I also now know to follow areas of heavy undergrowth. It´s harder to navigate, but a sign of civilization and a replanted forest. In the older, primary forest the canopy is so dense sunlight can´t get through- that means no one has chopped it down yet. No people, no rescue..... Like I said, useless info, but I´m happy to be your phone-a-friend.
Guido´s a fan of the Ajo tree, says it reminds him of an office building or Manhatten sky scraper. "There´s so much activity going on in there." Never thought of it that way.... the bugs, moss, vines, birds, monkeys, sloths, snakes, they all use it. No different from pigeons, roaches and workaholics, I guess. Lots of food, lots of resources to help keep a lost gringa going.
Next it´s the soldier ants. They clear the junge of any living insect to take back to their queen. One woman, thousands and thousands of men. Hmmm.... Then he tells me their sole purpose is to protect her (well, they all can´t mate with her!!) They do whatever it takes to make sure she survives... take a bullet, become dinner or drowning themselves in a stream so their bodies can be used to make a bridge for her. Kinda like getting lost in the jungle with your own secert service. I´ll make sure to bring mine.
But back to my termite. That was today´s lesson (and lunch) at the animal rehab center. Ironically, I didn´t even mention my fascination with survival skills. Alvaro just picked it off the tree and handed it to me. "Bite this he says." Yea, I´m kind of turned off, but it´s tiny and I always wanted to be on Survivor. I position my hand so it crawls from his finger to mine and crunch. He laughs at the face I make, "Now you can survive in the jungle."
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